So, following numerous uneasy experiences in the past few days, it got me thinking. There is not merely one type of run-in. There are in fact many categories, including:

1) The Kiss-and-Run (In): this involves hurriedly kissing the acquaintance on the cheek whilst mumbling ‘hi’; swallowed by the wind created from your speediness of bolting off from the situation.

2) The Inconvenient Hang-Around Run-In: this happens when you have expressed the necessary things to say and your conversation has dried up, however you are unable to leave/bid farewell to the person. Most often this eventuates whilst waiting at the train or bus station, during train or bus rides or when queuing for clubs, events etc.

3) The Intoxicated, Spill-All (excuse the pun) Run-In: these occur whilst out on the town and don’t seem so uncomfortable at the time. This is because you are tipsy and are therefore more friendly than usual. Although, the next morning you realise too much of your (or other peoples’ for that matter) life story/dirty laundry was divulged to the particular individual(s) and you asked them unusually confronting questions (which seemed fine at the time).

4) The Classically Awkward Run-In: for the life of you, you can’t remember their name. Enough said.

5) The Non Run-In Type 1: you continue to glance at one another as you recognise them from somewhere. But you either don’t remember where you met, it was too long ago to even comprehend saying hi or you are unsure if they remember you. Despite the fact that you are both making direct eye contact.

5a)The Non Run-In Type 2: you catch the other person’s eye, but it would be too unbearable to even smile ‘hello’, so you pretend not to see them. Or they do the same thing to you. However, it is highly offensive when you are perfectly content with a rendezvous, yet the acquaintance blatantly signals that they will continue ignoring you. Rude.

6) The Better-Be-Polite-Or-It-Will-Get-Back-To-My-Family Run-In: when you are forced to converse with your parents’/grandparents’ friends which entails the 20 Question Game: “how is uni/work? How many years left of your degree? How is <insert extra-curricular activity>? Any boy/girl friends? How are Mum/Dad/brothers/sisters/pets?” and so on... until your face cracks from the fake smile plastered across it for such a lengthy duration.

7) Case Of the Ex Run-In: quite self explanatory really. This occurs when you bump into your ex/unofficial ex/person you kissed a billion years ago. On one hand it can be embarrassing because you completely regret the past you shared with the individual or you look like a dog’s breakfast (which totally ruins the fantasy of running into your past lover looking ravishing; making them question why they broke up with you- such a stunning catch). Or on the other hand, it can be hurtful as you may not be over them. Or they’re with their new girl/boyfriends, which emphasises the wanting-to-melt-into-the-floor syndrome on your part. And who could forget the wanting-to-kick-her/him-in-the-face syndrome too.

8) The Taken Aback Run-In: the acquaintance you spot has changed their appearance so dramatically since you last saw them, that’s all you can concentrate on whilst you’re conversing. In turn, it’s as if someone has pressed mute on the conversation; your full attention placed on their new boobs/pumped lips/drastic weight loss or gain/hideous haircut/baldness/goth make-up. Hence, you are forced to pretend to be following the discussion by grinning and nodding your head at estimated intervals (which may turn ugly if you grin upon news such as their grandma dying recently).

Wow, who would’ve thought that such a trivial concept could be so complex?

If only a tracking device existed which beeped when an acquaintance entered our vicinity; warning us to duck into the next alleyway. Wouldn’t that make life a lot simpler?

Or I could just move to Timbuktu.

Image by antmoose licensed by Creative Commons